


향수 (Nostalgia)

by Grey_alltheway



Category: Mamamoo
Genre: Angst, F/F, Romance, hyejin is speechless, wheein is multitalented
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-25
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-18 12:27:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21561121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grey_alltheway/pseuds/Grey_alltheway
Summary: A story about how a single person can overturn your life in ways you never imagined.Hyejin is misled by love once more. The distress feels repetitive until one night, after one more outburst, and she learns just how balanced the universe is, how heartbreak is followed by new beginnings. Because it cannot function otherwise.
Relationships: Ahn Hyejin | Hwasa/Jung Wheein
Comments: 18
Kudos: 93





	1. Make Me Forget

The rain was falling swiftly against the window sill. The room was silent, the two people inside it not knowing where to go next. There was nothing to do anymore, and Hyejin knew it. She had been there before and she swore to herself she would never end up in such a position again. Even so, there she was, once again, facing someone who couldn’t share her feelings. 

She felt embarrassed. 

“Why did you do it, then?” she asked the girl in front of her, who couldn’t even look her in the eye. “If you didn’t feel anything on your behalf, why are we even here? How did we end up here?” 

“Hyejin, I didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want to send you off like that,” the girl explained herself, but Hyejin couldn’t find the logic in the excuse. “You’re such a good person, you really are.” 

Hyejin furrowed her brow. “I’m a good person, and yet you followed this instinct that told you to get further involved with me, only to later break it off, because that would somehow hurt less?” The girl looked away, seemingly ashamed. “What were you thinking?” Hyejin’s tone grew louder, and her anger usually determined her attitude and her words to be sarcastic. She knew that with the heat inside her rising, she wouldn’t be able to hold her insults for much longer, so she simply stood up, grabbing her belongings. 

The girl reached out, trying to hold her back. “Hyejin, I can explain, really.” 

She scoffed. “I _really_ don’t see how you could, Yujin.” 

Without further goodbyes, she slammed the door behind her and punched the elevator button several times, as if that would make it come faster. She realized she was irrational, but she couldn’t care less. She just wanted to leave the damned building. 

As the elevator took her down several floors, she fumbled through her bag, desperately searching for the pack of cigarettes and lighter. She was thankful Yujin didn’t follow her outside, trying to convince her to stay. She was good at that; begging. 

And Hyejin was good at falling for it; like a fool. 

When she finally lit a cigarette and exhaled a long smoke for the first time, it felt better than it ever did, she found. She tried to empty her mind, letting the sound of rain and city flutter take away her sorrow and built-up frustration. 

How she always fell in this trap, she failed to know. Always getting involved with the wrong party like it was fun business. It never ended well and one would think she would have learned. 

Quickly enough she realized she had no umbrella on her, and the light beige overcoat did nothing to keep her warm. She was far from home. 

She looked around, hoping for a small place she could stop in while the clouds were pouring down. As fate would have it, a bar on the street across from her looked really convenient at the moment. A dark, bloody red neon sign that read 향수 glimmered over the entrance. _It’s not nostalgia that I feel, but it’ll do._

From outside it didn’t appear like much, but when she stepped inside, the warm air surrounded her. There was a mixture of faint alcohol and cigarette smell. It was dimly lit, except for the bar and a small stage placed on the right from the entrance. 

At that moment two guys were performing, one of them playing an acoustic guitar, the other singing with overwhelming emotion. _Showoff,_ Hyejin thought. Though, to be fair, her judgement was a little clouded and on such occasions she was often a little bitchier than usual. 

She sat down on a stool by the bar, feeling her entire body fall heavily. She sighed like the world would not give her another chance at life, and looked around with little interest. None of the drinks looked intriguing, yet she wanted to have them all at the same time. 

Falling into deep thought, she didn’t understand Yujin’s beaviour most of the times. Hyejin wasn’t someone to flirt constantly, only when she felt like there was a real connection. Yujin gave her that vibe, like she was agreeing with her, like she wanted more from her. Once she analyzed the events further, Hyejin thought Yujin might have simply been confused. Either too afraid to get too close, either curious to see what it felt like. Hyejin understood that feeling, the need to try, but there was a difference. 

Yujin had realized early on it was not working for her, but not once did she say something to Hyejin. She never asked to stop being friends, to stop seeing each other. She just became more and more distant. 

And then the kiss happened. 

“What can I get you?” a voice asked, bringing her back to the present. 

“I honestly don’t know…how about something to make me forget?” she tried and the bartender nodded, turning to prepare the mystery drink without hesitation. Hyejin, surprised he picked up her suggestion that easily, inquired, “How come that worked?” 

“I get that order more than you think. That’s why people come in for, most of the time.” 

The drink turned out to be quite strong, but after finishing it early on, she didn’t really feel its effect, so she asked for another one. Her student years had prepared her well enough for her adult life, she concluded. 

Different musicians walked up on the stage and did their numbers, but neither really caught her attention. The occasional applause and cheers from the back of the club would distract her, trying to part her thoughts from Yujin and their so called relationship. Without realizing when she started crying, she felt tears running down her cheek and she couldn’t believe she was crying over such a stupid situation, over a worthless person. 

_It can be like that sometimes, I thought_

_I tried forgetting everything from the past_

There was now a different girl on the stage and her mellow voice made Hyejin finally look up to the stage. She was seated, wearing a checked suit with a faded pink skirt. She had long, brown hair and her melodious voice paired with the piano behind her incredibly well. Her manner was emotional and suave, everything from her voice to her expression carried heartache. With the lift of sensitive lyrics, the message of the song was delivered through her powerful performance. Hyejin could tell the song was plain experience, and the girl was bold to expose her feelings like that. By the way she was singing, there was no possibility the song was a simple melody she learned and passed forward, but pain that had been lived deeply and which left scars. 

Hyejin felt the resonance of the ballad, her own emotions growing intense, as the girl performing managed to sweep her away from her frustrations and her past. In that moment everything was out of reach, besides the hurt girl on the stage with a unique voice, a tone so fragile, yet stable, of a kind Hyejin hadn’t heard before. Her features were delicate and graceful, a rare type of beauty which somehow deepened as the song evolved and her charm grew together with the high notes. 

The song ended with a smooth _Let’s break up_ and she remained seated, her eyes closed as the crowd applauded her loudly. She deserved more, Hyejin thought confidently. 

After she left the stage, Hyejin turned towards the bar, left quite speechless after witnessing the girl perform. She downed her drink, feeling the need to smoke, an overwhelming emotion threatening her already heavy state. That usually meant one thing for her, but she quickly shook off the thought, since it was the last thing she needed. 

She found the exit that lead to a small back yard portion, with a few tables and chairs which were currently vacant. The same ritual followed, the long drag and slow exhale, feeling the drug fill her lungs and perhaps never leave. She leaned back on the brick wall, looking up at the dark sky. The rain was falling lightly; maybe she could see stars later. 

By the time she was halfway through with her cigar, she heard the door open and a figure came out to sit down. She didn’t glance to see who it was, simply occupying herself with the smoke and the way it looked in the lights attached to the wall. She figured the other person would do the same. 

Only when she was done with the cigar did she look next to her, where the girl who had performed, the one who completely seized her attention, took one of the seats at the table. She had a lost look in her eyes; she was somewhere far away. Tears were running down her smooth cheeks. 

“Are you all right?” Hyejin asked her, as she crumpled her cigarette in a glass ashtray. She didn’t respond. 

“Hey, are you okay?” she inquired again, and only when Hyejin shook her hand lightly did she look up. 

“Yes, I’m… I’m fine.” Her rushed reply only made Hyejin doubt her. She wiped her cheeks, turning her frown into a forced smile. Her pink lip gloss was still intact, just as striking. 

Hyejin raised her eyebrow. “You don’t seem to be.” She sat down opposite from her. 

When she didn’t say anything in return, Hyejin chose to compliment her performance, sensing it wouldn’t be long until she would do so anyway. “That was… quite outstanding back there, by the way. I thought you were really good at expressing your feelings.” 

The girl looked at her again, this time catching her eyes, and smiled faintly. “Thank you… I mean, they are stored up, so I’ve got enough of them,” she said and chuckled, a little awkwardly. 

“A lot of history to the song?” Hyejin wondered, pulling out another cigarette from the pack. 

“Quite a bit, yes.” She leaned back on the chair, sighing deeply. “It was actually my first time performing it, so I guess it got the better of me.” 

“Slightly overwhelming?” She nodded. 

“Well, with great pain comes great product. You really reached to me, too,” she admitted. 

“Really?” 

“Yes! I don’t know why you seem so surprised. It was quite a number. I mean, I hardly paid any attention to the ones before you. You just caught my ear.” The girl now grew this natural, charming smile. Taking her hand to her heart, she added, “I’m still recovering”, making her giggle. 

Her confession came from an unknown place, because she rarely said such things in first time conversations. Truth be told, she never had similar comments to share. But she didn’t wish to hold back; she wanted the girl to know how good she was. 

She seemed a little blown away. “Wow, I… well, I have to admit, I didn’t expect such a feedback. But I’m happy it happened so.” 

They smiled at each other. “If I had a glass, I’d raise it to heartbreaks.” 

The imaginary toast made the girl laugh, and Hyejin found, without much surprise, she was even more beautiful when smiling. Her laugh was jubilant and Hyejin took just a moment longer to look at her. She seemed out of this world, this girl. 

“I’m Wheein, by the way, Jung Wheein,” the girl introduced herself, extending her hand. 

“Ahn Hyejin,” she replied, shaking it firmly. “Wheein… that’s such a unique name. I suppose it matches its owner.” 

Another remark to come out of nowhere, but it made Wheein blush fast and Hyejin couldn’t help but think how cute that was. She wasn’t going to apologize for it, because the sight made her heart flutter. 

“So…” Hyejin started as she crushed the cigarette butt once more, “you got any plans for tonight?” 

“I didn’t really have anything planned besides going home and feel the the deep pain caused by the song,” Wheein said, and Hyejin noticed how despite the message of that statement, she didn’t seem saddened. 

How her mood was improving the more they were talking. 

“You want to head off somewhere, then?” Hyejin suggested an outing not only in hopes to keep Yujin off her mind and their problems distant, but she felt like she didn’t want to part with this girl quite yet. 

Wheein smiled and nodded eagerly. “I’d love to.” 

They both agreed they could go grab a bite; heartbreak made people hungry, Hyejin decided, and Wheein laughed, despite the truth behind the comment. 

Every time Hyejin heard her laugh she was thankful she entered that bar in the first place, because it sure made her evening, even her entire day better. And not only compared to what had happened; those events now seemed distant and trivial. 

The only thing that mattered now was the connection that was growing between the two girls with every joke Hyejin told and the reaction it determined from Wheein, because even though she was beautiful when sad, she was striking when she was happy. An image to remember. 

_Please be gentle with me, Jung Wheein,_ Hyejin thought to herself as she followed Wheein back into the warm bar. 


	2. 24-hour cafes

The night was young, Hyejin always used to say, and on such occasions she loved spending it to its maximum. 

She didn’t long for her bed in the slightest, due to the mere thought that it would be a lonely, cold place which only brought rough memories. 

In addition, she might have just met the girl, but she was not ready to part with Jung Wheein yet. The more they talked, the more she discovered this lively and compelling character. She was the type of person to gradually let you in; the more she agreed with Hyejin, the more she visibly relaxed and started to act natural around her. 

“Right, I do suggest one thing before we head off,” Hyejin said as they were preparing to leave the bar. 

Wheein raised her eyebrows. “I am intrigued.” 

“I think the way to properly kick off this evening is to do a shot.” As Wheein didn’t look too pleased hearing her suggestion, Hyejin insisted. “Just one. And it shall be of your choice.” 

Wheein scanned the options, taking her time in doing so, and Hyejin started tapping her fingers impatiently on the counter. 

“Just give me a second, I’m not too experienced in this.” 

Hyejin replied with a faint “that’s all right”, because she found her simply too cute, at least put opposite her own experience when facing multiple alcohol options. 

Her choice of poison was acceptable, at least good enough to give them a kick for a night out in the lively capital. 

“Next up, where would you suggest we go to eat?” Hyejin asked as they walked out of the bar, wrapping their coats around themselves. The rain stopped completely, but as the night progressed, it was getting chilly. 

“Well, I think we can just choose one of the 24-hour cafes. They’ve got quite good food,” Wheein suggested. 

“Really? Nothing a little… fancier?” 

“Honestly now, do you feel fancy tonight?” 

Hyejin chuckled, having to agree with the girl. The evening was a pinch brutal at the beginning. Though, the way things were settling at the moment, she felt like she could leave it all in the past and move on. To think of it, she had never moved on so quickly. 

“Anywhere you want, then,” she told Wheein, stealing a glance when she giggled about her small victory. Anything that would make her happy worked for Hyejin. 

Hyejin sensed in her thoughts she was going a little too far a little too soon. She knew things were running on a thin rope at the moment. Beginnings were always frail, to be handled with care. 

But it was also instinctual, in a way. She didn’t think ahead when suggesting or replying, like she would on other first-time meetings. Things came naturally to her. Though soon, Wheein made her feel genuine. 

“See, I told you there’s a shocking range from sandwiches to choose from,” Wheein said as a matter-of-fact after entering one of the several small cafes, found nearly on every street. 

Soft music was playing in the background, and as Wheein ordered them two sandwiches and drinks Hyejin looked around the room. She had to admit that the way the room was arranged set a pleasant mood for a quick dinner in the city. There were small tables with less than four chairs to each, small candles lit on every one. The brick walls had Christmas light bulbs hanging, so the light wasn’t so striking, compared to the dark night outside. 

“So, do you like it so far?” Wheein asked when she set Hyejin’s drink in front of her. 

“I do, actually. I have to admit, you were right about the atmosphere, it’s relaxing.” 

“Wait until you taste the sandwich, it’s so rich in flavour, you won’t get enough of it.” 

Raising her bottled cider, Hyejin made a toast for the second time that evening. “Well, then, here’s to an unforgettable night.” 

“And 24-hour cafes!” Wheein added happily. 

Smiling, Hyejin took a gulp from the strawberry-flavoured drink and started to wonder, out of the blue, how did the two of them get there. 

How did Wheein end up writing such a sad song, only to perform it in front of Hyejin, and possibly change her life? What tragedy did it take for the beautiful song to happen? 

“I’m not so sure you’ll like the prelude,” Wheein answered when Hyejin asked her pressing question. When Hyejin raised her eyebrow, anticipating the story, Wheein took a deep breath and dived right in. “We had been dating for about 3 years and from my perception everything was great. We were getting along really well, rarely arguing and generally having a good time whenever we got together. We shared so many interests, always having something to talk about.” She paused, looking at the walls behind Hyejin. She didn’t look her in the eye, she simply looked down. “Then, about 2 months ago, I found out he was cheating on me.” 

“Oh…” Hyejin uttered, feeling some type of way; perhaps disappointed. “He?” 

“Yeah, he,” Wheein repeated, and showed something of a repulsed expression, as if she herself was disappointed. 

Hyejin cleared her throat, wanting to carry on. “How did you find out?” 

“The best way possible. I saw a text from her when he forgot his phone on his way to the store. I’m not the type to go through your business and check on any connections you have, because I generally trust whoever I’m with. That’s one of my rules,” she explained, and her voice started trembling. The betrayal in her eyes was so strong, Hyejin started feeling bad she asked in the first place. “Full disclosure, you know? That’s what I ask for. If you don’t feel good anymore, just say it. There’s no need to go behind my back.” 

Her teary eyes determined such a wistful expression, and Hyejin sensed her feelings were overwhelming her again. 

“I’m… I’m sorry I asked, I should have thought the wound was still fresh,” Hyejin said, Wheein simply shaking her head. 

“You’ve got a right to know.” 

_Do I?_ Hyejin thought, the thought that they just recently met pressing her. 

“Hey, look at me,” she asked softly, reaching out for her hand. When Wheein’s glossy eyes fixed on her own, she carried on. “How about you forget about him tonight? I know it’s not that easy, three years can seem like an eternity sometimes, so you just do it bit by bit. If he did something like that to you, he does not deserve to occupy your thoughts anymore. He was stripped of that right the moment he engaged in something else. It doesn’t matter how good he was, how kind and understanding, not if he had it in him to do such a thing. And above all, to you,” she told her, earning a blue smile from Wheein, despite the fact she was serious about it. 

“You’re very nice, thanks for saying that,” she replied, wiping her tears. 

“Hey, I mean it. I might have just met you, but when I go on such a rant, I’m pretty serious.” 

Wheein chuckled, and the joyous smile was warming its way back on her face. 

“Now, onto serious matters. Where does this guy live? Can you give me his number? I’d like to settle a few things with him,” Hyejin said in between Wheein’s genuine laughter. 

Hyejin did her best to divert the conversation from the asshole that broke Wheein’s heart. Her confession made her so angry, though she did her best to conceal it; she hated cheaters to death and generally couldn’t understand such a behaviour. 

Following her advice, Wheein forgot about him, at least on the outside. Joke by joke she went back to being sunny again, getting to enjoy the tasty sandwich she had praised so much, which ended up being as good as she described it. 

What she had learned so far about Wheein was that she was right most of the time, undoubtedly someone to trust. 

“What do you suggest next, Jung Wheein?” Hyejin inquired after leaving the cafe with a full stomach and a drive for more. That familiar desire fueled her, the way it always did when she was having a good time. 

She wanted more of the city, more of Wheein, and less of heartbreaks. 

“Let’s see… what about Cheonggyecheon?” she suggested with bright eyes. 

Even though no fatigue was traceable on Wheein’s features, Hyejin was worried she would be tired after the tough evening, that she would rather prefer going home to rest. But her spirited attitude spoke for itself. 

“Oh, I remember that place… I haven’t been there in quite a while. Let’s go, then!” Hyejin’s only memory of the space was of a visit with her mother, a few years back, which turned out to be something of a history lesson about how the stream was built. She remembered vaguely listening to her mother, since she didn’t really care about how or why it was reconstructed; she just thought it looked pretty, and wanted to admire the final product. 

“Did you always love writing songs and singing?” Hyejin asked her during their stroll to the established place. 

“I’ve enjoyed singing since I was a child, at least my mother always told me I had an inclination towards music. In my teen years I started exploring my talent, if we’re calling it so, by taking singing classes. I started writing lyrics only in my 20s, after having been through some more serious stuff.” 

“Oh… nothing traumatic I hope?” Hyejin asked. 

Wheein shook her head, smiling. “Not that far, no. Just normal feelings based on relationships, crushes, the whole romantic bit.” 

“And do you often play in the bar?” 

“I only recently started singing, building up my courage. Previous to these sessions I used to play the piano for other singers,” she informed Hyejin, managing to amaze her again. 

“You can play the piano? That’s so cool… it’s such a beautiful instrument. I always wanted to play it.” 

“It’s worth it. I might teach you one day,” Wheein said tentatively. Hyejin smiled, biting her lip. “But admittedly, a few years ago I started being more attracted to the deeper aspects, so to say, writing the lyrics and composing.” 

“I see… I always feel like I could write endless novels based on my experiences.” 

“Popular girl in high school?” 

“Not that, no. I was always straight-forward when it came to relations. Though not straight,” she blurted out, landing a far-stretched joke. That definitely came out of nowhere. 

She usually didn’t get easily embarrassed, but this time around something was off. She certainly didn’t plan for her explanation to take a different turn, but it was too late to take it back now. Without knowing what else to add, she simply shut up, feeling her cheeks redden. 

Wheein’s reaction was an unexpected one. “Oh, nice pun!” She laughed, and it helped break the ice that Hyejin felt surrounded her. “I like that one, you should use it when you’re on a date. It’s a good opener.” 

Hyejin was dumbfounded. “Really?” 

“Of course. I mean, you’re a funny person without trying, so I don’t think you ever worry about such things.” 

Well, she was worrying now, although she couldn’t tell why. It’s not like she was going to hide it from Wheein. 

But was it too soon? 

_This whole evening is too soon, Hyejin._

A few minutes later they reached Cheonggyecheon, and it was as beautiful as she remembered it. 

“Let’s sit down by the water,” she proposed. 

It was a quiet night, with no wind and little traffic. It was a Thursday, so there were few people, but the lights were just as bright and colorful like it was the weekend. 

Hyejin figured the city didn’t need to be crowded to be alive at night. 

They sat down, remaining in silence for a while, simply enjoying the view. The lights coming from buildings and street lamps reflected in the water, and as it shimmered, it determined a relaxing image to look at. Hyejin’s mind started o wander again, thinking about that awkward reply over and over again, as if she had said something wrong. She had to remind herself there was nothing wrong in a joke and that Wheein took it as a good thing. No insults happened, so she was worrying in vain. _Shake it off already,_ she told herself several times. 

Wheein spoke up first. “Hyejin-ah… If you don’t mind me asking, what brought you into the bar tonight?” 

Hyejin smiled; the memory turned out to be less and less painful whenever she referred back to it. “Also a break-up. Though I doubt you can even call it that.” 

“How do you mean?” 

“I had this… thing going with a girl. We met through a friend, coincidentally also at a bar. He introduced me to this shy, quiet girl who didn’t seem like my type, but once we got to hang out more often, she opened up to me gradually and I found a sweet, smart girl.” She took a moment to block out any memories with Yujin that were threatening to overcome her. “At the beginning she was curious, but then, as she figured out she didn’t like me like that, she changed.” She kept her eyes on the shimmering water. “I thought, fine, we’ll just be friends. I had been there before. But then, one time, totally out of the blue, she kissed me. I wasn’t expecting it, I had given up on the thought that something might happen. That was a week ago; today she told me she can’t keep on doing this. Riding a train that doesn’t have a destination, I believe were her pathetic words,” she said, beginning to feel spiteful again. She closed her eyes and shook her head. It wasn’t worth it, she told herself. 

“What an asshole,” Wheein said, sounding appalled. “What were you to her, an experiment? A tryout to be gay?” 

Hyejin chuckled. “I felt that way sometimes. But… she’s gone now, so it doesn’t matter anymore.” 

“No, this is still not okay, Hyejin,” Wheein continued, more outraged now that Hyejin was calm. 

“Really, Wheein, I’ve moved on, no need to worry about something in the past. It’s not coming back.” She smiled at the brunette reassuringly. “I’ve had help tonight.” 

Finally, she smiled in return. “Yeah, me too.” 

“I mean that sandwich _really_ helped me forget,” she teased, making Wheein throw her head back from laughter. 

They changed the subject from heartbreak once more, as Wheein told Hyejin about her compositions over the years and her passion turning into something serious. She had finished Korea National University of Arts and stated it was one of the most wonderful experiences she had had so far, meeting tons of people with the same interests. 

Around 2 am they both decided it was time to head home, only with the promise to meet again, the sooner the better. Phone numbers were exchanged and Hyejin’s excitement grew further. Somehow, she wasn’t afraid like other times. 

Wheein’s home turned out to be rather close to Hyejin’s, so she offered to walk her home. Her body started to feel the weight of the day, and her mind buzzed with all sorts of feelings and new information. The fight with Yujin seemed to have happened days away. She still didn’t want to part with Wheein, but she figured they would have more to share this way. 

“Well, this is me,” Wheein said as she stopped, gesturing towards a 10-story block of flats. Her gaze settled on Hyejin, remaining silent for a moment. Neither of them knew how to start off their goodbyes. Wheein simply smiled warmly. “Thank you, Hyejin. I couldn’t have asked for a better evening. I never would have imagined tonight would unfold this way, but I’m really grateful it did.” 

“It was quite memorable, wasn’t it?” 

Wheein smiled again, broadly, giving Hyejin an image to remember. 

To dream of. 


	3. Carpe Vinum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carpe vinum (Latin phrase) - seize the wine. 
> 
> Wheein and Hyejin enjoy another outing together, making Hyejin more and more aware of the feelings that are growing shamelessly and inevitably.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should begin with an apology, because at the time of the posting I had forgotten to put a link to the video that inspired the idea of this story. Thanks to a kind comment, I was reminded to do so. It's a very beautifully edited video, accurate in details and effects; I highly recommend watching it. Also, I would like to thank everyone who has read so far, giving kudos and comments, I hope you'll like it from here on as well! 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWOQAefmrn0&t=7s

The following morning was a little rough on Hyejin. She had forgotten to draw the curtains when she arrived home, a little before 3 am, so the morning sun made its way tauntingly in her room. She had given up on personal hygiene, simply taking off her clothes and crawling under her sheets. She even forgot to put her phone on silent, so around 10 am, her mother woke her. She murmured something inaudible when she picked up. 

“Rise and shine, Ahn Hyejin!” her mother uttered loudly, making Hyejin distance the phone from her ear. “Are you still in bed? It’s almost 11, why aren’t you working already?” 

“Ah, mom, please… I’ve had a long night,” she managed to say in her defense. With her free hand she rubbed her eyes, hoping she could get her vision back. The light was awfully bright for her awfully slow system. She wasn’t even hungover, barely having drank anything the other night. 

“Yes, well I told you, you should take it easier with all the clubbing. You’re not in college anymore, you’ve got a job now, so you have to be more responsible.” Hyejin really didn’t have it in her to fight the criticism, so she just listened to the familiar earful. “What did you do last night?” 

Hundreds of images flashed by her eyes, so many different instances, that she had difficulty picking just one. “I’ll tell you when I remember,” she lied, giving her mother the satisfaction of another preach. 

After she ended the conversation she glanced at her bright screen, noticing the time was barely a quarter past 10. “Almost 11… mom, you really love to exaggerate.” 

As she proceeded with her daily affairs, her mind started to wake up, catching up to her body’s needs. Wheein’s voice slowly crept back in her head, and she remembered the sweet melody she was in desperate need of. Will she ever hear it again? 

Her hand itched to reach for her phone, search through her contacts and find Jung Wheein and text her. _Did you sleep well? How are you feeling? Do you have any plans for today?_

Hyejin shook her head swiftly. Perhaps too soon to text. 

Forbidding herself to text didn’t help drive her out of her head. While she was mindlessly brushing her freshly washed hair, she balanced her options and each of their consequences. The final results told her she would either risk losing their connection by not talking, or risk taking it too far since… since Wheein did just brake up with a man. That area had not been covered yet, so Hyejin’s hopes deflated faster than a balloon. She was probably another straight girl who enjoyed her time with Hyejin solely because she was a good person, to quote a certain someone. 

“Ah… drop it, Hyejin-ah. Before it’s too late,” she told herself. 

She sat down in front of her computer with the intention of writing an article for the issue that would take the stands the following week. She was working for a Korean fashion magazine, a very praised one. She fit right in, with her impeccable sense of fashion and instinct when it came to piecing outfits together. Though she was the youngest in the office, people respected her because she was good at desk work, at aspects that often went beyond the pure fashion that occupied her. 

She managed to get absorbed in her work, finishing the article in minimal time, without any distractions. _Ain’t no feelings going to stop me,_ she thought to herself proudly, and grinned at the final product. 

As she leaned back on the chair, she lit her first cigarette of the day, satisfied with the fact she didn’t need one so far. But she took it as a reward. 

When her phone rang and she checked the caller, she felt everything turn to ice again. That’s all it took to overturn her day. 

She picked up, without saying anything. Smoke was gradually filling her small kitchen. 

“Hi, Hyejin. I hope I’m not disturbing you, I just wanted to check in.” 

Silence. A slow drag from the burning cigarette, and a steady exhale. 

“You haven’t replied to my texts, so I didn’t know if something was wrong, or if you’re not okay in any type of way…” 

Further silent treatment. The ticking of the clock was the only sound in the still kitchen. 

“Listen, I know what I did was wrong, I deluded you without intent and now I’ve created a mess. I ruined a good friendship and I hurt you, and I just want to apologize for my behaviour. It was really stupid.” Her voice was quivering. 

Still no response. She took one last drag, crushing the cigarette bud in her black ceramic ashtray. 

“Can you ever forgive me?” 

Exhaling, she memorized those words, that gentle, wary voice and the image of a teary Yujin, and hung up on her. 

*** 

“So, what you’re saying is she ended something that wasn’t even happening?” Hyejin’s best friend, Moonbyul, asked, trying to understand the whole affair with Yujin. 

“Basically,” Hyejin replied, looking at Moonbyul’s confused expression and feeling relieved she wasn’t the only one who found the whole situation out of its place. “And to make it even more interesting, she called me today to, get this, _check up on me._ ” 

“What?!” Moonbyul’s exclamation was a little loud for the quiet restaurant they were having their lunch in. A few people turned their heads, but she wasn’t flustered in the slightest, because she was busy being too shocked at Hyejin’s telling. 

Hyejin nodded lively, sipping her cup of coffee. Before Moonbyul got another word in, a slim figure ran towards them from the entrance. Her other good friend Yongsun was making her way hurriedly to the table. 

“You guys better not have started without me,” she told them as she dropped her bag and plopped down on the chair opposite Hyejin, panting. 

“We could never, darling,” Moonbyul said, her grin showing and Yongsun could tell she was lying. “Guess what: Yujin ‘broke it off’ with her.” 

“Broke what off? I thought she was straight after all,” Yongsun said, just as confused as everyone when told this story. She desperately took out a fan from her bag. 

“A fan in your bag in October?” Hyejin said, trying to keep her laughter to herself. 

Yongsun seemed equally done with both of them, shaking her head. Then her eyes softened, as she asked, “Are you okay, Hyejin-ah?” 

“Yeah, I really am.” 

“She also called her this morning,” Moonbyul continued the narrative, more interested in the story than Hyejin’s feelings. 

Yongsun was baffled. “You called her? Why would you call her?” 

“No, Yujin called her,” Moonbyul cleared the subject, pointing towards Hyejin. 

“Can I tell please my own bitter story?” At Moonbyul’s apology, she continued. “Anyway, she wanted to see if I was alright, but I said nothing, I just let her talk. And then I hung up.” 

“Really?” Moonbyul exclaimed once more too loudly, while Yongsun remained shocked. 

Hyejin simply shrugged. “I had nothing to say to her. Well anyway, I met this other girl, she’s quite unforgettable.” 

The ladies before her were baffled, but inquired more information. Hyejin was sure to mention her memorable performance, her own break-up story, but mostly everything about her beautiful personality and the voice and laughter Hyejin couldn’t cancel out of her head. She told them about their night and how they got along so well, despite the prelude. 

“So then… that’s it with Yujin? Chapter closed?” Yongsun asked. Hyejin nodded. 

“And you’re moving on with this Wheein?” 

“Depends what you mean by moving on. She’s straight, I think,” Hyejin said. “But even if I’ll just be friends with her, I would be grateful. She’s got this incredible presence which I feel lucky just to be around.” 

The other women looked at each other doubtfully, wishing Hyejin to be happy, but to steer away from being hurt again. The carried on talking about it, about Wheein and about their own businesses. 

When she was waiting for the bus, she felt her phone buzz in her pocket. A text message. 

Jung Wheein: _Hey there, Ahn Hyejin. How are you doing? Have you rested? I was wondering if you were busy later today. I’d love to see you again._

*** 

Mentally urging the bus driver to go faster, she was eager to get home and ready herself for another outing with Wheein. She happily accepted the invitation, not really thinking about sentimental implications. She decided she would keep her mind off any sentimental and/or physical attractions, and just enjoy her presence. The moment itself. 

She paced for about 30 minutes in front of her closet, every door open and every drawer pulled back. She had about an hour left until the settled time and she was starting to freak out. 

_I always bask about having too few clothes, and when I have to choose, there’s too many options,_ she thought to herself and immediately realized how it sounded. 

“Quite the first-world problem, Hyejin…” 

She considered the cold that had set over her the last night, so she chose her black leather jacket, which was quite warming, with a long flannel shirt and a simple black scarf around her neck. Black jeans and black boots generally fit her style; once she looked in the mirror she amusingly figured she’d only need a motorbike to complete the look. 

They chose to meet at a small bar between their homes, so neither would have to go too far, especially when it got dark. Hyejin got there earlier, surprisingly, since her long black hair fought hard against staying in a proper ponytail and she thought she would be late. She hated the thought of making Wheein wait for her, she’d rather have it the other way around. That gave her plenty of time to look at her surroundings, and admire the clear, blue sky. _I’ll finally get to see stars tonight._

“No, I promise I’ll go by there tomorrow and I’ll make it work. I’ll teach you whenever you have time.” The familiarly pleasant voice was near. 

Hyejin had to turn around to see her, and once Wheein spotted her she quickly ended the call. “You didn’t have to hurry,” Hyejin told her. 

Wheein waved her hand. “It was a done deal anyway. Well, hi. It’s good to see you again.” 

Her heart grew bigger hearing Wheein’s kind words. “You too. And you look really nice, too.” 

Well, she looked gorgeous but Hyejin didn’t say that, thinking it might be overstepping. And it would break her rule of not diving into any sort of feelings. 

She was wearing a large white t-shirt tucked in beige pants, with black high-heeled boots and a dark blue jacket. She found her style crossing between casual and fancy, something she really appreciated. 

“Shall we go in then?” Hyejin proposed, when Wheein’s smile was becoming too distracting. 

This other bar was much smaller, with a few tables and some couches, besides the bright bar. They ordered two glasses of wine, rosé for Wheein and red for Hyejin. Wheein sat down on one of smaller couches, of a dark red soft material, while Hyejin waited at the bar. 

“There you go,” Hyejin said as she handed her drink. 

“Now what are we toasting today to?” Wheein asked, interested. 

Hyejin smiled. “Should we toast to bars? We keep on finding our way back to them.” Wheein agreed and they clinked glasses. 

“So tell me, Ahn Hyejin, if you’re a charmer at night, what do you by day?” Wheein asked, as she settled in the comfortable couch. 

Chuckling, she told her about her job at the fashion magazine. “Like your passion, I’ve always had an attraction to clothes, accessorizing and making an outfit work naturally, no matter what the event, the dress code. And as it turns out, I love writing articles and interviews too.” 

“So if I picked up a magazine from your work and leafed through it, I’d find one of your articles?” 

“You would,” Hyejin said, nodding. “Though, I have my favorites, so I’d rather have you read those first.” 

Wheein laughed, saying, “That’s how you’d charm me, huh? Impress me?” 

Hyejin giggled, though it sounded more like an unusual titter. She was determined to not go there, but she couldn’t just let it hang in the air. “I think I’ve already done that,” she winked at the girl, taking a sip from the bitter wine. 

Wheein did the same, smiling boldly. 

“And you? Do you sing for a living? You should be making millions if so,” Hyejin said, unable to turn off the compliments related to her singing. She just couldn’t let it go. 

Wheein went on to tell her about her own job, one which sounded more fun than Hyejin’s, she thought. “I work at a recording studio. That implies playing the piano for instrumentals, composing melodies, revising songs for other artists. I’m lucky enough to be able to record my own stuff sometimes.” 

“Wait, so you’re telling me you have a recorded version of the song you played the other night?” 

Wheein nodded emphatically. “Would you happen to want a copy?” 

Hyejin’s outrage made the girl laugh again. “Are you kidding? I want 10 copies! You’ve been hiding it for what exactly?” 

“The third date, that’s when I reveal my work,” she explained, all the while amused at Hyejin’s dismay. 

“Well, now you’ve got to invite me to your studio. And to give me piano lessons,” she reminded her. 

Wheein’s eyes were glimmering so beautifully in the warm lights of the bar, radiating genuine excitement and joy. 

By the time Hyejin was done with her wine, she was invited the next day to Wheein’s workplace to witness the beauty. She informed her that the studio version sounded even better through professional loudspeakers, and Hyejin trusted anything she said by that point. 

“Let me go get you another one,” Wheein offered, and before Hyejin could complain, she was up on her feet, walking with purposeful swagger, or maybe that was just Hyejin’s mind playing with her. 

_Either way, what a woman…_

She couldn’t help such thoughts anymore, not under the effect of alcohol, and as a result, she had given up on the pact she made with herself to not have any romantic implications or thoughts about the girl. It was inevitable. She was inevitable. So she chose to assume that risk. Even being hurt by her would a privilege. 

“What are you thinking about?” Wheein asked as she sat back down next to her, and she was closer than last time. The sweet perfume reached Hyejin’s senses and she smiled. 

“You trying to teach me piano.” She raised her glass to her and drank from the fresh glass. 

The evening, like the previous one, had passed too fast for Hyejin’s liking, and before she realized, she was feeling quite sleepy. She tried to conceal it, she really did, but when Wheein asked if she wanted to go home, she circled around the subject, trying to find a good excuse. 

This time around Wheein offered to walk her home, saying the same thing Hyejin did, that hers was close enough. 

“Well, I think I might have to prepare for tomorrow, I have a feeling it will be quite an impactful day.” The excuse that she came up with seemed to have the right effect, as Wheein was humbled. 

“You probably shouldn’t regard me so highly after just one performance, I might be just the moment’s strong illusion.” 

“No, I doubt that. My instincts are usually good,” she said proudly. “Besides, there’s no way you’re an illusion.” 

When they reached her entrance, Hyejin remembered what she wanted to do for a while. Looking up, she smiled widely. “Look at the stars!” 

“Oh, they are so many… I’ve always loved a clear sky.” 

Thousands of small lights beamed from the dark sky, joining the nearly full moon and generating a powerful image. 

Continuing to smile, Hyejin looked back at Wheein. “Well, thank you for another beautiful evening, Wheein.” 

“It was my pleasure.” Her eyes continued to gleam like before, but this time her expression was different. 

Before she could decrypt the look in her eyes, Wheein left a soft kiss on Hyejin’s cheek, retreating slowly. “Good night, Hyejin.” 

Backing away, Wheein smiled, she smiled at Hyejin’s manner. When she felt Wheein’s figure get closer to her, her warm breath and her soft lips against her cold cheek, her body turned to stone, feeling like she broke a barrier, even though she hadn’t moved in the slightest. The kiss left an invisible burning mark, something that would occupy Hyejin’s thoughts for the night, and Wheein knew it. She knew exactly what she had done. 

She continued to smile as she walked away, like it was the most casual thing. Except that sole action overturned Hyejin’s entire world, all of her intuitions crashing. 

All in a manner of seconds. 


	4. Lost in Rapture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wise men say only fools rush in
> 
> But I can't help falling in love with you...

Saturday morning came fast for Hyejin, as her sleep had been a deep, quiet one which she fell into moments after crashing on her bed. Though this time she was careful to shower and feed herself, in an attempt to become less and less hectic. 

When she opened her large bedroom window, chilly air blew over her sleepy senses. It was a sunny morning with clear blue skies, so she could see Seoul plainly, all of its white and grey buildings, the cars and the people acting like accessories to the form the city adopted as it kept extending. 

Turning around, she saw last night’s clothes thrown on her desk chair. The events had haunted her until the very last second before falling asleep. And even in that moment, like an imagine becoming clearer, Wheein’s short kiss came back to her, thrill and vigilance stirring her heart. 

She was in agony. She had a strong will, the fight to push back any new feelings had held right up to the point where they reached her street, when everything was brought down crashing by a kiss. A mere kiss on the cheek; how frail human nature was… 

Everything was in chaos now because hope had risen. With Wheein getting closer to Hyejin, closer in every way possible, a new sentiment was born, and that was the one that stung the worst. Because where there was faith, expectations grew and expectations were rarely met. It always took something big. 

Wheein was a dream to continuously have, a beautiful painting she didn’t want to tamper with. So she chose to go with the hard path; resist the temptation, resist the flirtation that was staring her in the eye like a monster and carry on… 

_At least… until there would be palpable evidence perhaps?_

She turned to look at herself in the mirror attached to the large closet. “Ah, really, Hyejin-ah, shut up already.” 

The two girls agreed to meet by noon, at the studio Wheein was working at. Hyejin felt quite excited to be able to visit such a place, having always been curious where and how artists recorded their songs. She did her best to tone it down, since she had some research to do for an interview with an author for the following issue. At least work would play the only constant in her life. 

For her late waking, noon came quickly and she had to dress already. Another internal turmoil to go through; without realizing, she was putting more effort into the outfits she wore when meeting Wheein than she did for most of her dates. Eventually she chose a long cotton dress, a pattern with large squares, in combination of dark blue and green with beige lines across its width. It was longer in the back, and she had a belt around her waist. She kept her make-up natural and let her hair flow on her right side. 

As she came closer to the address Wheein texted her, her nerves were inexplicably building up. There were more explanations in the text, giving exact directions which left no room for obscurities. 

When she entered the building she noticed a wide room with a desk right in front of her and several couches and tables to her right and left, like a waiting room mixed with a common room. There was no one there, but music could be heard from several places, of several kinds and intensities. The nearest, loudest source came from her right, from the room Wheein instructed her to enter. 

Somewhat precariously she headed towards the spotted door, her heartbeat increasing. _I better not get killed,_ was her thought before opening the door. At first glance what she noticed was the very door she was pushing open in a mirror across from the entrance. 

A rhythmic rap song was playing through the loudspeakers and a girl was dancing in the center of the room, facing the mirrors, so she was with her back to the door. 

Energetic movements were articulating the rap song and the girl’s body was moving fluidly, without missing a single beat or messing up a step. Hyejin didn’t know the choreography, but she didn’t have to, because she could tell the girl was working on perfecting it. She was wearing baggy jeans and a white tank top, her hair flying as she spun around. Realizing perhaps too late for a third date, the girl dancing was Wheein. The girl with praiseworthy moves was Wheein herself, and before she could remain in shock for the rest of the dance, Wheein noticed the stunned figure by the door and turned the music off from the touch of a button on a small remote. 

“Hi, I didn’t notice you there,” Wheein said with a big smile. She rushed over to hold her door open. “Please, come in.” At her gesture, Hyejin took a few timid steps whilst holding Wheein’s gaze. 

“I can’t believe you,” she was able to utter. “Is there something you _can’t_ do?” 

Wheein laughed at that exasperated face and voice that transformed Hyejin, like last night. “Yeah, all right, I do some dancing too.” 

“When were you gonna tell me? Or is this how _you_ impress me?” She folded her arms like a stubborn child. 

“You got me,” she grinned shamelessly. “Honestly, though, I’m supposed to revise this routine, so do you mind if I go through it once more?” 

“God, no, please. Go ahead,” she said and got out of the way hurriedly, leaning against the wall. _Go ahead, please do that again._

“Thanks, it shouldn’t take long. I hope I won’t bore you,” she said, smirking purposefully. That smile couldn’t be distorted by Hyejin’s mind, the seducing was deliberate. 

As she played the song from the beginning, she pocketed the remote and looked up in the mirror with a changed expressions. That was her game face. No grins, no kind eyes, only a focused attitude reflected in the mirror. On the first regular beat she started the routine, dancing expressively. Her body matched the rhythm instinctively, as she focused on hitting every step at the most accuracy. None of the heavy attention reflected on her expression; her face was nonchalant, occasionally smiling to accentuate a certain allusive move. The execution was flawless, and her laid-back manner touched base with the style of the song. The puzzle connected perfectly for her, every aspect tying itself to the next without problem. She wondered how much practice it took to reach such excellence. 

The shortened version of the song came to an end as Wheein turned around, walking away from the center, from what would be the crowd. 

“Jung Wheein, I must let you know, I think you’re out to steal hearts,” Hyejin said when Wheein looked at her expectantly, heart chest rising and lowering with heavy breathing. Her skin was glistening, and Hyejin did her best to keep her eyes off from the exposed toned stomach. 

“Did you really like it? Do you think it works with the song?” 

“Are you kidding? It’s a perfect match. I mean if you do it this way every time, hats off to you.” 

Wheein’s eyes softened again, becoming the look Hyejin knew so well already, accompanied by her sweet smile. 

This whole event was like a slap in Hyejin’s face; _handle this one, too._

*** 

While Wheein went into a back room to change, Hyejin grabbed her phone and wrote a quick message in her group chat with Moonbyul and Yongsun. _You guys, I’m not entirely sure Wheein is straight._

Without fail, Moonbyul was always the one to reply first to such messages; not to more important matters, though. _Elaborate._

_She keeps giving me these hints; it’s becoming a constant flirtation, I swear. And you know I don’t blow things out of proportion,_ she wrote back, as her foot tapped the floor impatiently. 

An entire minute of waiting for the reply seemed like forever to her keen heart. Finally, Moonbyul typed back something against her desire to hear; _Wasn’t it the same with Yujin…?_

Hyejin almost vocalized the words as she typed them angrily. _It most certainly wasn’t._

Yongsun joined the chat at last. _It sounds like you want something to happen. Last time we checked, you were set on keeping things the way they were._ She could almost hear her wary voice. 

Hyejin sighed, rolling her eyes. _I don’t know what I want when she is constantly implying something. I mean, you don’t kiss a person you just met because you want to be good friends._

Moonbyul sent back a plain sad emoji. Rare were the times when she was serious from start to end. 

As she heard noise from the room Wheein was in, she hurried to type back a last text. _You guys are not helping me._

“Sorry I made you wait,” Wheein said, as she locked the door. “We can go on now.” 

She tied her hair in a ponytail, and put on a plain dark green shirt over her sports bra. 

“There’s no hurry,” Hyejin said, taking a last glance at her unread message and locking the phone. “What are we starting with?” 

“Well this room, for example, is one of the few practice rooms in the entire building. People generally do what I just did, rehearse or create choreographies.” 

The following room she got to see was an actual recording studio, pretty similar to the kind she had seen in movies; two rooms, separated by a thick glass, a single door connecting them. The one they had walked in had a large mixing board in front of the glass with several buttons and switches, things Hyejin could only stare at and read the description, but have no idea what each meant. 

“You’re wondering what all of these are, right?” Wheein guessed her thoughts. At her nod, Wheein started explaining a few of them, the simpler ones, yet Hyejin failed to remember most of them. 

The darkened room behind the glass held only a microphone and a stand in front of it; Hyejin guessed it was for lyrics or notes. 

“So… do I get to see you in action?” Hyejin asked, after she felt appropriate time passed. She didn’t want to seem to excited. 

But Wheein knew she was waiting for it. She smiled, and gestured for the chair. “Sit down, and put on these headphones.” After handing her a pair of gigantic headphones, she turned on the mixing board and pushed a few buttons. 

“Do you know what you’re doing?” Hyejin asked like a brat, only for the humor of it. 

“I’m actually setting the temperature and air humidity in there,” she said with a deadpanned attitude. 

Hyejin, having no idea what that board could do, lost her smile and took her word for it. “Really? You can do that?” 

“Of course not, I’m adjusting the volume and intensity so we don’t go deaf,” she said, beaming at Hyejin’s fake indignation. Giving it up quickly, she laughed, to which Wheein could only reply, “Have you lost your touch for jokes, Ahn Hyejin? Have I softened you?” 

Hyejin was still shaking her head in disbelief when Wheein closed the door behind her. She put on her own pair of headphones and, after readying herself, becoming serious and focused once more, she gave Hyejin the signal to play the backtrack. It was perhaps the easiest instruction; the button was one with the universal signal on it, that much she knew. 

Like clockwork, Wheein started the first verse on the first beat, and the story began once more. The sorrowful voice returned, and Hyejin realized how long it had been since she last heard it and how different her voice was otherwise. Indeed, her mellow voice sounded even more incredible when it was all Hyejin could hear from the headphones, without other distracting sounds around her. Despite the growing emotion on her face, her voice was defined by a distinct clarity, so not once did Hyejin have the trouble of not understanding a lyric. Wheein transcended into a different world, she transformed into a different person, becoming the heartbroken party once again. Ending the song with her soft voice, it felt like she was letting go of the pain, her face lighting as if misery left her body at once. 

Through her glossy eyes, she could see Wheein glancing at her, smiling contentedly. Before she returned, Hyejin wiped her eyes quickly, removing the headphones. 

“Were those tears I just saw?” Wheein asked, sitting down next to her. 

“No, there must be something wrong with the glass, you were foggy the entire time. You should clean it from time to time,” Hyejin advised in return to Wheein’s chuckling. “What’s the title, by the way? I never asked.” 

Wheein’s smile subdued slowly. “‘Goodbye’.” 

Hyejin felt it repetitive to tell her how wonderful her song sounded again, how it touched her - because Wheein knew that aspect. But she did it anyway, calling her an angel in disguise. She had nothing to lose out of complimenting, and she was set on letting Wheein know how talented she was. 

Just like that, the cheerful Wheein she knew returned, and before she could tell, she found herself to be the wistful one. 

*** 

After lunching together and walking through central Seoul, having a gentle breeze accompany their pleasant stroll, they took the bus that dropped them off in their neighbourhood. Wheein’s home was the one closer to it, so Hyejin offered to walk her to it. 

Reaching the front doors, Wheein looked at her, and Hyejin could tell an idea sparked inside. “Would you perhaps like to come upstairs?” 

There was a weird feeling in Hyejin’s stomach, like the well-known butterfly thing when your crush asks you out on a date. Or to go upstairs with them. “Perhaps I would.” 

The modern building had white walls with nice wooden mail boxes for each apartment and light blue entrance doors that lead to the floors of apartments. Wheein pushed the elevator button and explained, as they were waiting, “It was renovated a year ago. That’s why it looks like a hotel. A reception desk would complete the picture.” 

“It really would,” Hyejin agreed, as she stared around. Even the stairs looked brand-new, like they were barely used. She guessed her building still waited for the renovators. 

Wheein’s apartment on the 7th floor was just as new as the rest of the building. Hers had two rooms, like Hyejin’s, but the living room was a bigger, holding a black upright piano which was backed against the wall, just below the windows. 

“This way I can see the view while composing or practising,” she explained to her as she sat down on the wooden bench. “It’s beautiful to watch when it rains, or when it snows.” 

“Is that how you composed ‘Goodbye’? With the melancholic rain in the background?” 

“Actually, yes. It helped set the mood. I mean, you don’t write a break-up song when it’s sunny outside and kids are playing cheerfully.” She shuffled through a portfolio with a bunch of scores. 

“Are you going to play me something?” Hyejin asked, dropping her bag on a traditional beige sofa. 

Wheein nodded, selecting a certain written piece. “I know you’re waiting for it.” Smiling, she patted the empty spot next to her. “Come.” 

Hyejin sat down next to her, feeling like a shy fan. “Are you sure I’m not bothering you?” 

“Well now, how else are you going to learn? I chose an easy piece, and I’ll play it for you first, okay?” 

What Wheein didn’t know was that as a child, Hyejin was thought the basics by her grandfather. He had this brown grand piano, and she was always fascinated when she heard him play. She had then learned which keys play what note, what the black keys were, and the very first song learned was “Happy birthday”. Now, as she looked at the instrument she remembered her grandfather dearly, able to recall which notes were the keys Wheein pressed down. The song she played was pressingly familiar, but she couldn’t put her finger on it. 

To her hard-thinking expression, Wheein answered, “Ode to joy.” 

At Hyejin’s request, she played another one, one which she confessed to have played quite a few times after her break-up. She pressed the keys to play the heartfelt song, and though she loved it, Hyejin was always left feeling downcast. “The winner takes it all” by ABBA was a song she referred to when feeling betrayed or broken, so she immediately fell for Wheein’s choice. 

“God, that really took me places for a minute,” she confessed. 

“I know, right? It’s dangerously saddening.” She agreed, and put another paper in front of her. “I think you’ll appreciate this one even more.” 

She recognized the song the moment she heard it, and she decided on the spot that’s what she wanted to learn. “Bohemian Rhapsody” was a song that touch nearly every soul, she believed, because how could it not, simply? 

At Hyejin’s satisfied expression Wheein smiled. “I knew this one would touch base. How about I teach you the very famous piano part?” 

When Wheein started explaining the introductory breves of the song, and Hyejin played them as told, the girl raised an eyebrow at how quickly she memorized the order, but she didn’t say anything. After a few times practising the intro on parts, Hyejin wanted to piece it all together. She knew Wheein was doubtful if she could, but after she was reminded of the basics, Hyejin’s short-lived musical times with her grandfather became fresh memories again. 

Half an hour later, she played the adored piano instrumental of “Bohemian Rhapsody” acceptably, and she couldn’t help but smile widely. By the look on her face, Wheein was proud, but a bit confused nonetheless. Be it famous, but the track wasn’t quite as easy for a complete beginner; at least, as Wheein knew it. 

“Want another one?” she asked when Hyejin considered she knew the piece well enough. 

Nodding enthusiastically, Hyejin wished for another beautiful piece. 

Her wish was granted. She recognized the Elvis Presley classic, having vivid memories of her parents dancing on the song. “Can’t help falling in love” seemed perhaps too close to reality, because the sentiment was growing, it was growing without control. Somewhere between Wheein’s closeness and her enjoying it all too much, she let go of the restraints she put up for herself. 

Her eyes departed from Wheein’s swift hands, travelling up to her composed expression. Her eyes followed her deliberate hands, and her lips slightly parted, once in a while singing bits of the song. She fell into the trance of the song, and Hyejin was hopelessly enchanted. Only the piano keys and Wheein’s presence were of importance. 

At one point the music stopped and her gaze was met by delicate brown eyes. “Wheein-ah, I…” 

She had no idea what she was about to say, but it didn’t matter, because everything went dark. Gentle lips met her own, and Wheein kissed like she sang, a passion Hyejin rapidly complied to. Melting into her touch, Hyejin let it all go. Who leaned in seemed trivial, details that didn’t highlight what was important. Hyejin’s only thought was that she was too good at it, this couldn’t have been her first rodeo. Taking the moment by its horns, she immersed herself completely into Wheein, into everything she stood of. Her unmistakable fragrance wrapped herself around Hyejin, driving her into a state of bliss, a wildly soft, yet forceful exhilaration that seemed to go on and on. Her lips felt like fire, intensified by deep desire. Every touch was new and different, and the moment made her lose it all. 

When their greedy lips parted, neither distanced herself from the other. It was a different kind of moment, a moment faintly stopped in the gap of time, when both of their eyes were still closed, when they were still holding their breath. Though they were no longer touching, Hyejin could still feel her. The absence of Wheein’s mouth was striking. 

Wheein opened her eyes first. Hyejin expected to see, at once, how everything changed. Yet, when she was brave enough to open them, she met the same look. It was still the heartbroken Wheein she met, the bright Wheein she got to know, and the virtuous Wheein that she fell in love with. 


	5. Entrust Yourself in Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything is out, all the feelings and thoughts, and it seems the two girls couldn't have found a better match for each other.

Wheein touched her ribcage lightly, in an attempt to bring her back to her. When Hyejin opened her eyes and looked up to her, Wheein smiled, but only her eyes did. She didn’t need anything else to tell her it’s all right. 

“It’s still me, Hyejin-ah.” When tears sparked in her eyes, Hyejin took Wheein’s hand, which rose with her eccentric breathing. “I haven’t changed my mind, I’m still crazy about you.” Though she could see sincerity in Wheein’s eyes, something inside her still had trouble letting go of disbelief. “I’m not leaving you,” she told her, wrapping her arms around the girl tightly, and it felt like the most reassuring thought in the world. “And I’m not letting you go either. How could I let someone like you go?” she continued, and Hyejin had no idea how to turn it all around, because she felt the same, but much, _much_ luckier. 

Feeling like she was about to cry harder, she wondered out loud, “How can someone cheat on you?” She buried her face in Wheein’s hair, an incense of something that was incredibly calming. “How blind can you be?” she complained further, her voice slightly masked by Wheein’s hair. The girl chuckled. 

When Wheein pulled back, she held Hyejin’s face, wiping her tears swiftly. The look she gave her, such an endearing one, it made it all worth it. She was nearly thankful for Yujin, for their senseless relationship, because her anger drove her into the bar where everything started. Two girls that found each other thanks to unforgettable heartbreak. Somehow, amidst tears and severed trusts, in the most unlikely place for new beginnings, the two of them fell for each other in ways their previous partners could never. 

“Are you still with me?” Wheein asked, squeezing her hand lightly. Hyejin nodded, and she could tell Wheein saw something off across her features. She didn’t know how to tell her that her mind always caught on slower. “Is there something wrong?” 

Shaking her head, Hyejin leaned in and captured her lips between her own. She needed to know what the present felt like, what reality stood for; she needed to stop being trapped in the past. She had to free herself from previous doubts, from events that happened only once. She had to make herself understand Wheein was different, and that she shared her desire. 

Her kiss took Wheein by surprise, but she didn’t hesitate to kiss her back, and once more, Hyejin entrusted herself in Wheein. They were in perfect harmony, understanding each other’s rhythm and needs like it happened earlier. Like never before, she felt like she could give herself entirely to her and nothing bad would happen. For some reason, she was certain nothing would break now. 

“Do you want anything? To drink or to eat?” Wheein asked after a while, when Hyejin’s unease still hadn’t left her state entirely. 

“Is it too early for some wine?” 

“It never is. But I only have rosé, I’m afraid,” she said as she stood up. 

“Not a problem.” 

“Though, you’ll have to let go. Just for a bit,” Wheein said, since Hyejin’s hand was still clutched her own. 

She smiled and giving it a kiss, let it go. Realizing what she needed to relax, she grabbed her white duffle bag and fished out her nearly finished pack of cigarettes and her beige lighter. 

“Wheein-ah, where can I smoke?” 

“Just come out here in the kitchen.” 

She opened the window for her, and motioned her to sit down. The glasses were filled with the pink liquor to their half, waiting for them. Placing an ashtray in front of her, she took the seat next to her. The first drag had the same liberating effect as it did when she was holding up too many emotions, and the world silenced in the moment. 

She tried holding the smoke as far away from Wheein as possible, even though she assured her she didn’t mind. They raised their glasses, and Hyejin knew she was waiting for a toast. 

“Here’s to… to us!” 

“May it last,” Wheein added, clinking their glasses. 

“Straightforward.” 

“Though not straight,” Wheein continued, grinning. 

She laughed about it, but could still feel remains of the awkward joke. Exhaling, she told her how embarrassed she had felt in the moment. “I had no idea where you stood on the subject, and I felt like I risked the entire build-up we had.” 

“I was actually happy you made that joke, it made me sure about you. That’s why I made advances,” she replied and answered Hyejin’s long-lasting questions. 

“So you’re bisexual, then?” 

Wheein nodded in approval. “Unlike others, I know for sure.” 

Hyejin shook her head, taking a gulp of wine. It all mixed perfectly; she could still feel the ghost of Wheein’s intense lips, and now that she had the smoke and wine aromas, she could finally think again. Her body and her soul deserved a lifting sensation, something to help her leave the dreadful place she had been stuck in. 

“You would have done it the other night, right? Kissed me then?” Hyejin asked because that had also been on her brain, not fitting in with the portrait Wheein painted of herself. 

To her expectations, she nodded. “But something about you told me you weren’t there yet. You weren’t ready.” 

“And yet I trusted you. I have since the beginning, it’s like an instinct.” 

“No matter, I wouldn’t have it any other way.” She reached out for her hand, which Hyejin gladly gave. 

Finishing her cigarette, she turned her attention completely to Wheein. “So… what now?” 

Wheein leaned it, resting her elbows on her knees, and she took both of Hyejin’s hands and kissed them. Her parted bangs fell beautifully on her chiseled face. The lips she wanted to feel over and over again until it would hurt were smiling indolently. Her eyes shined with happiness, a look of thrill for what the future held. Her angel in the form of a perpetual song. “Now I get to love you.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to every single one of you who has read this story, even left kudos and supportive and wonderful comments, it always feel nice to know someone enjoys reading what I write. It means a lot. Sorry for the short chapter, but I've felt it right to maintain a more concise conclusion. I hope you've liked this story, and thank you once more, for following it through.


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